Just Another Day in Paradise

Mauritius, © Google Maps

She’d said little since he’d picked her up at the airport. Instead, she stared out the back window of the cab, her eyes wide, her lips parted.

“Will you be staying with us long, Madam?”

She hadn’t answered. Instead, she’d pointed at a parking area, making noise could have been a grunt–or perhaps just some unrecognizable word. She pried open the door and lurched across the lot like a sleepwalker.

When she hadn’t returned in ten minutes, he’d walked up to the facilities and looked around. Which was when he noticed the sandals strewn on the sidewalk. And then, just in view down the forested trail, a blouse. He followed the narrow path, past a pair of trousers and a series of undergarments.

She was under the waterfall, eyes closed, wearing nothing but a smile.

He reached for his phone and called the desk. “We lost another one.”

149 words

This has been another edition of What Pegman Saw. Great location, Josh! This lovely place is a vacation for the eyes. I don’t know how they can get the tourists to leave. I don’t think I could!

To read more stories inspired by the prompt or to submit your own, click here.

30 Comments

  1. Brilliant Karen. You led me down a false path at first; I was expecting a difficult reunion of some sort, not seduction by an irresistible cascade of water. The ending was funny but also left me wondering what happened to your MC and everyone else who’d been drawn in. Really well told.

    1. Seems like the sort of place I should investigate! 😉 Thanks for reading JS!

      1. You’re welcome.

  2. Spellbinding, kind of odd – loved it. Could be the opening to something longer, a mystery as to why people are drawn there and can never leave. Very enjoyable, Karen

    1. Thanks Lynn. A longer mystery would be fun, especially if I got to write it from there!

  3. This is really excellent. I was expecting somebody to happen upon in flagrante delicto but instead we have a rapacious waterfall Nessie lurking beneath the Cascade. Well done as always 😉

    1. It was mostly wishful thinking. What a wonderful spot!

  4. Yes, from what I can tell it’s quite beautiful there, but I don’t think I’d be stripping nude at the first sight of a waterfall. If I had the money, it might be a nice place to retire and get away from it all.

    1. Hehe, the Mauritius Board of Tourism is grateful for your restraint. 😉

      It does indeed seem like a wonderful spot. Aside from the murderer you uncovered in your tale.

      1. Ideal locations often have a dark underside.

  5. The text would seem ominous if not for the title and the gorgeous photo –and the funny last line! It looks so gorgeous there, I can understand the woman’s reaction. Although personally, I would have left my undies on. Probably.. 😉

    1. lol! Yes, she seems to have gone a little overboard! Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂

      1. Well, sometimes you just have to go with the feeling. 🙂

  6. Seems this (damaged?) young woman found solace at last. Instead of living under strict control, she was warmed by nature and its simplicity. At least that’s my take on it. I enjoyed this.

    1. I like your take, seems perfectly plausible to me. Thanks for reading 😉

  7. What a delightful daydream! Super story, Karen. You evoked the sense of the irresistible very effectively.

  8. Lavanya

    When the tale began, I was expected a reunion but the ending was a masterpiece- nicely done!

    1. Thanks so much, Lavanya!

  9. I was half expecting a suicide, but it sounds like she found just the opposite! Fun story 🙂

    1. Yes, I guess that would be the opposite! I’m glad I surprised you. Thanks for reading!

  10. Dear Karen,

    You left me under that waterfall with all kinds of questions. Brilliant. Always leave the audience wanting more. You certainly did.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  11. oh bliss!
    nature reprieve
    water cascade to cleanse….
    nice fiction….

  12. What fun! You lead us from a seemingly (or really) depressed woman to a frightening trail leading to an unknown end and finally bliss under the waterfall. Killer last line.

  13. An awesome twist – I was expecting something grisly and gory 😀

  14. Thought I already commented here, but the “like” was not done. So, very good. Enjoyed the spirit of it all and the twist again at the end.
    Scott
    Mine: https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2017/10/22/tropical-paradise-what-pegman-saw/

    1. Thank you so much. Glad to see your post too!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s